Survey finds that people grieving the loss of a pet most want acknowledgment, yet they are more likely to receive no support after a pet dies.
The loss of a pet can be deeply painful, but it often receives less support than the death of a person.
The Sympathy Survey by Gourmet Gift Baskets found that people whose most meaningful loss was a pet were less likely to receive support for pet loss, including messages, calls, flowers, meals, food, or memorial donations. More than one in four pet-only mourners received none of the support types listed in the survey.
At the same time, people grieving the loss of a pet were more likely than people grieving a person to say they wanted one simple thing: acknowledgment that the death happened.
The message is clear. Pet loss does not always require the same practical help as a human death. But it does require recognition.
Key Takeaways
- People grieving a pet are more likely to receive no support: 27.5% of people whose most affecting loss was a pet received none of the listed forms of support, compared with 16.8% of people grieving only a person.
- Acknowledgment is a major need after pet loss: 42.3% wanted others to acknowledge the death, compared with 31.9% of person-only mourners.
- Support should come quickly after pet loss: Pet-only mourners welcomed a check-in for a median of 21 days, compared with 30.5 days for people grieving only a person.
Loss of Pet Receives Less Support
People whose most affecting loss was a pet were less likely to receive most types of support after the death.
A total of 27.5% of pet-only mourners reported receiving none of the listed forms of support. That compares with 16.8% of people grieving only a person. This means pet mourners were 10.7 percentage points more likely to receive no support at all.
Food support showed the widest gap. Only 20.1% of people who experienced a pet loss received prepared food, groceries, food delivery, or a food gift basket. Among person-only mourners, 45.3% received food support. That is a 25.2-point gap.
The gap is not only about food. People grieving a pet were also much less likely to receive flowers, calls, meals, or donations made in memory of the pet. Many people may not know what to say after a pet dies. Others may see the loss as less serious than the death of a person. But the survey shows that a lack of support can leave pet mourners feeling alone.
People Grieving a Pet Want Their Loss Acknowledged
People grieving a pet asked for less practical help than people grieving a person. That makes sense. A pet’s death usually does not involve a funeral, legal paperwork, insurance claims, or estate issues.
People coping with pet bereavement did not want to be overlooked. Their top unique need was simple recognition.
The main lesson is clear. Pet mourners may need less help with tasks, but they still want their grief to be seen.
A pet loss condolence message can meet that need: “I’m so sorry about Luna. I know how much she meant to you.”
This type of message recognizes the pet by name. It also recognizes the bond between the pet and the person grieving.
Pet Grief Needs an Early Check-In
The window for offering support after pet loss may close sooner than it does after the death of a person. The median welcome period for a check-in after pet loss was 21 days. For person-only mourners, it was 30.5 days.
Most pet mourners were still open to a check-in after one week. But the share who wanted a later message dropped faster than it did among people grieving a person.
The best time to send a pet sympathy message is soon after the pet dies. A message during the first few days can be especially important. A second message within one or two weeks may also be welcome. Waiting months to acknowledge the loss may mean missing the time when the person most wants to feel seen.
The Best Pet-Loss Message
The most appropriate message for pet-only mourners was the same message that ranked first in the full survey:
“I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m thinking of you.”
A total of 88.6% of pet-only mourners said this message would have felt somewhat or very appropriate.
This works because it is short, direct, and does not try to explain the loss. It does not suggest that the person should feel better because the pet was old, sick, or no longer suffering. For more guidance on personalizing a message and avoiding common phrases that can fall flat, see what to write in a sympathy card.
Top 5 Condolence Messages for Pet Loss:
- “I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m thinking of you.”: 88.6% of pet-only mourners said this would be appropriate, compared with 84.3% of person-only mourners.
- “You and your family are in my prayers.”: 75.2% of pet-only mourners said this would be appropriate, compared with 80.8% of person-only mourners.
- “I’m thinking of you today. I’ll check in again next week, but you do not need to reply.”: 75.2% of pet-only mourners said this would be appropriate, compared with 72.8% of person-only mourners.
- “You do not need to reply. I’m here whenever you want to talk.”: 74.5% of pet-only mourners said this would be appropriate, compared with 81.3% of person-only mourners.
- “I will always remember how kind [Name] was to me.”: 67.1% of pet-only mourners said this would be appropriate, compared with 79.3% of person-only mourners.
The phrase “At least they are no longer suffering” was more accepted after pet loss. Half of pet-only mourners, 50.3%, rated it appropriate, compared with 38.7% of person-only mourners. Still, it should not be a default message. It may fit when a pet was very sick or in pain, but it should come after a direct acknowledgment of the loss.
Using AI to Write Condolence Messages After Pet Loss
Pet-only mourners were more likely to be upset by an AI-assisted sympathy message.
Nearly half, 49%, said they would be somewhat or very upset if someone used AI, such as ChatGPT, to help write a sympathy message. That compares with 41% of person-only mourners. The difference was biggest among those who said they would be very upset. Almost one in three pet-only mourners, 31%, said they would be very upset by AI-assisted wording.
Pet mourners may already worry that others will not take their loss seriously. A generic or automated message may make that feeling worse. AI can help someone start a draft. But the final message should sound personal. It should use the pet’s name and include a real memory, observation, or sign that the sender understands the relationship.
How to Support Someone After the Loss of a Pet
Pet loss is often not met with the same support that follows the death of a person. The survey found lower levels of messages, calls, flowers, meals, food support, and memorial donations.
Yet pet mourners are not asking for a major event or a perfect gift. Their clearest need is acknowledgment.
The best response is simple:
- Reach out soon after learning that the pet died
- Use the pet’s name
- Say that you are sorry
- Recognize the pet’s role in the person’s life
- Do not expect a reply
- Send a short follow-up within one or two weeks
- Avoid minimizing the loss
- Make any AI-assisted draft personal before sending it
A strong message could be:
“I’m so sorry about Charlie. I know he was part of your family and your everyday life. You do not need to reply. I just wanted you to know I’m thinking of you.”
The survey supports one clear point: people whose most affecting loss was a pet often receive less support, even though many want their loss to be recognized.
Methodology
The Sympathy Survey was conducted from August 20 to August 25, 2026. It included 1,139 completed responses.
This analysis compares three groups based on the survey’s relationship question:
- Pet only, n=149: Respondents who selected pet and did not select a human relationship.
- Pet and person, n=226: Respondents who selected pet and at least one human relationship.
- Person only, n=764: Respondents who selected one or more human relationships but did not select a pet.
These groups are separate and add up to the full sample. No respondent was counted twice. This report focuses on the pet-only and person-only groups.
The results are unweighted. The estimated margin of error is about plus or minus 8 percentage points for the pet-only group and plus or minus 3.5 percentage points for the person-only group.
Results with a gap of 8 points or more are the strongest comparisons in this report. “Pet only” does not mean that a respondent has never lost a person. It means that, for the purposes of this survey, the death that affected them most was that of a pet.